lift and carry

Its been 2.5 years ago today. I’m trying to focus on… not the day, but instead, what positive changes… growth… leaps… bigness I have stepped into since. The progress. Instead of focusing and rewinding myself right back to those moments 2.5 years ago…. What beauty have I created in the space he no longer occupies? […]

recognizable

I haven’t felt like writing about my life so much as I have been (& wanting to) actively participate in living it. Other outlets for my creativity have become available. Or… maybe I am just avoiding sitting with myself and getting honest in this space. I’ve been busy creating in other ways. Therapy helps but […]

&

I really don’t know if I would even want to, I wouldn’t want to spoil any of this and really, wouldn’t have wanted any of this to happen any differently… but if I had to. If I had to tell my newly-widowed self one thing. One thing that might help turn a corner faster. Or, […]

happy every year

If I had been looking into a crystal ball at this moment one year ago at what would have transpired for us in 2017… I know, with certainty, I would not have been able to comprehend it. At this very juncture 365 days ago, I was back home at the beach, after having been welcomed […]

gift giving

I was asked recently if sending a Christmas card to a grieving family who had recently lost a loved one was appropriate. Nothing wrong with asking me this question, I honor it. A whole lot. Anyone who is willing to ask me these types of questions is brave, mindful, and it shows a whole lot […]

love in photographs

This is the progression. The journey in photos of our time here at the beach thus far. That first photo was taken by Melissa right after we moved here last year. It was July 16th… 3 months to the day since Shayne died. I woke up griefy. Almost cancelled on them because I felt like […]

missing person

This isn’t something I could have anticipated. I miss him. A lot. A lot, a lot. Like stuffing it down, swallowing it hole, a lot. Feels like now, more than ever, I’m craving his presence, guidance, and friendship. Awake at night a lot. Closing my eyes, swallowing tears, catching my breath alone, a lot. Feeling […]